i don't want to get anything for Christmas 2011

here's reality - i have everything i need, and more.

could i use some new things?  sure... my computer is old, my clothes aren't perfect, so on, so forth... but everything works and i clean up well, and the reality is that most everyone i know is in the same position.

are you?  do you need anything for Christmas?  are you without clothes?  do you not have enough music to listen to?  do you need yet another iPod or blender or pound of fat on your belly?  will you use that 3 months of gym membership if you haven't been willing to get up and take or walk or find a way to use the stairs during your day?

and what about the people in your world?  do they need another decorative home item?  will another book they will probably never finish improve their life?

in 2011 $8.5billion in diamonds will be taken out of African diamond mines... ironically the same amount needed to cure hunger there.  and here at home, 45million americans are on food stamps... and as much as i love to point the finger at the abuse of that system, even if 75% of them are cheating, there are still a lot of americans going hungry.  think about these facts when you consider all the things you 'need'.

i live a meager life - on purpose - i have access to enough capital to get by very well, and live and awesome life... but i don't have a lot of disposable income.  most of us don't these days.  there was a time when i would blow a few hundred dollars a night on bar tabs, drove a fast german car, hung out with faster women, and spent my time and money carelessly.  i believe i have grown past that, and i let go of the money... but i still have time.  and i do give it.

when i was young, my parents often made us help feed the impoverished during the holidays.  it was more than giving a few cans of food to the church - we actually had to dress well and go into the city and help cook, greet, seat, feed, and clean up after those who didn't have a big meal with family and friends.

it was scary.  it was also one of the rare times i saw my dad come out of his shell, and put on a smile and go out of his way to make those people feel welcome.

imagine how belittling it feels to have to go into a church basement for Christmas dinner.  luckily there was someone like my dad there to welcome people in, wash away their insecurity, and talk with them a while.  i'm sure they will never remember him, but it helped shape the better part of the man i am today.

he also never really wanted anything for Christmas... and why?  he always lived simple, and made a point that he could go out and buy anything he needs or wants.  when i needed a house, he just cut a check... without thinking about the fact that he hadn't updated his wardrobe in 20+ years or bought a new car in my lifetime.  he didn't care about those things.  his friends and family were well, his kids were well fed and educated, his lights on and his belly full...

it a powerful thing to be that down to earth.

as you read this - realize that in our country we have a problem with PET OBESITY, yes, you read that right.  we are feeding our pets so well, that many of them have a weight problem.  we feel that people should get off their asses and work, but fluffy should get the extra yummy fatty treats.  and, it's true, people should get off their asses and work.

but consider ways to help them up which aren't going to conflict with your thoughts.  donating food in cans or in person can feed a lot of families, and donating clothes can help a lot of kids.  give money to a church or some effort you trust - but if you feel giving money blindly fuels the problem focus your efforts into something you think helps... and then think about the $200 gift you want, and realize that for $200 you can buy a lot of good cheap kids clothes and donate it to a shelter, or food for starving animals.

or ask people to give you a Christmas card instead of that $200 gift, and in that card a note mentioning what charity that person chose to get your equivalent donation.  and be happy that for Christmas, you had to do nothing, and yet you made the world a better place.

tis the season

don’t let the face fool you - it wasn’t too bad.

i come from a huge family - i mean HUGE. my mother is one of 17 children. my father is one of four, but by the time i came around he was the only one left in town... so when i was young there was PLENTY to do around the holidays. since then things have changed a lot, the extended families have trimmed back a great deal due to the loss of grandparents and more spreading by the younger generations, so what used to be a series of dressy events where you saw 100 different people now boils down to a laid back dinner and watching my pre-teen nieces tear apart simple gifts.

and until now, i viewed all this as a hassle. and it was a long time ago... when i was young and just wanted to be with my friends, but now i miss seeing my cousins and aunts and grandmothers. i miss the big affair at my grandmother’s estate, the ocean of relatives, the spread, the two meals at the other grandmother’s house prepared in a fashion only my mother can currently replicate. and i know that some day i’ll miss seeing my youngest nieces hand out presents and go ballistic at candies and games. and most importantly, the simple joy my father finds in seeing his two grandchildren happy and around.

i had a good year... it wasn’t easy, but a lot of people didn’t get the year i had. they didn’t get to chase their dream, they had to work a lot and not get paid much and face the looming economic crisis worried about their kids or homes. i don’t know where my dreams will take me in 2009, and there was a lot of unhappy in 2008, but in the end, i’m still a very very lucky man.

-season’s greetings