and, hopefully you got one with a decent user ID, you have a decent computer, and you have a smartphone of some kind (Blackberry, iPhone, Android). maybe, you also setup an account with Yahoo!
now, let's get involved... we're going to cover two ideas from this point: finding others, and communication. why find others? let's say there are 2 kinds of people to find: those you already know or knew... and those who may have information you need.
people you already know or knew: a few years ago my mother (who is one of 13 sisters) was talking about her wedding, and i asked who was her maid of honor back in 1967. in the end, it wasn't her sister, in fact it was a woman who she was great friends with, but who moved away when her husband was transferred. back in the 1970's and even the 80's people lost touch - phone calls from one side of a county were long distance and expensive, now they are free across the countRy. so, they lost touch... enter, super-son.
with a little knowledge (last thought to be living in DC, and the name of her husband), i hit the search engines, anywho, and so forth - and i found her. days later they were on the phone laughing and talking about the children and grandchildren and catching up. sadly, mom's maid of honor died a few years later, but she was so happy to again have the chance to catch up.
now, mom is 76 years old, her situation is somewhat of a challenge. however, anyone under born after 1970 (and in many cases, 1950), is going to be more active normally. so, let's think about who you may want to find. for me, it was two women i dated, one was easily found, the other a little more of a challenge.
the first gal moved home to go back to school in Virginia, i had an email address and an old phone number, IM info, a location... and the rumor that she got married, but really hadn't spoken to her in nearly a decade. Enter Facebook. It was with Facebook that I was able to contact her and not go through the odd awkward contacting her parents or possibly calling and getting a husband on the phone. we have now caught up! she is married to a guy who seems to be a really cool dude and they have two kids. after finding each other we email or tweet back and forth publicly... I make this point to show that while I can understand wanting to avoid the awkward call to an ex, there were no secret conversations after contact was made. We email, tweet publicly, I post to her blog, and if we lived in the same town I'd even hope to meet for dinners or lunches with him knowing. I don't expect people to use the internet for shady connections.
the second gal moved across the country after high school, she's the one who caused this series of blog entries. i had next to nothing, i wasn't even sure where she was - PLUS, her last name while far from complex, was also often misspelled, but kinda common. in that, i found a few people with her name - with both spellings - but none were her. Enter Facebook, again. Her brother i found through a chain of people, and I emailed him asking for her contact information - but he didn't reply. he did however, pass the message along that i was looking for her, and that's really the key. remember - some people may not want to be found! and, their reasons may be shady, but people have the right to live their lives however they want... just like its up to you to decide if you'll keep talking to them if you realize they are doing it secretly.
so... for people born after 1970 - Facebook is key. other valuable tools, sites like anywho.com... and think about he person in question & what they may be involved with. in my mom's case, all i had was some names and a 30 year old location, but the first friend i found has an online blog with her married name all over it, plus she's part of her college alumni club, and had other involvements that gave her a presence online.
and this brings up the real point of all this - getting involved. if you're this far along, you have your Google account, and you may have used that gmail address to sign up for Facebook and Twitter. HEY - just because you sign up doesn't mean you have to check in every day, some people check in monthly, but why not? be proud of your life!
i know a gal who gets all worked up if the men she's dating don't change their relationship info on social sites like Facebook, now she's engaged, but there are no pics of her and the guy online, and no mention of it on her page (isn't she proud?). she will say its unimportant and that she has better things to do than waste the 45 seconds it would take to show off her most recent accomplishment, after all, the dog she got made it, but apparently the engagement isn't an important life detail - but it certainly was important when she was looking at the pages of the men she was dating. people want to know, and most people should be proud of their lives. put up pics of yourself, show people how you've barely aged, the dog you've had since it was a puppy, your kids, and so on. don't be shady like the woman i mention here, if you're going to get involved - get involved, you don't have to tell your life story with dental records, but cover the basics and be proud of your life - someone may be looking for you too!
which brings us to the second part - communication! there is first and foremost, email. but also you can email within sites: Facebook and some bulletin boards have email systems within themselves, in fact, you will often be notified via email, when you have email on one of those systems.
then, there's 'chat', also known as 'instant messaging'. this is a system where a window opens and you type in it, whatever you type in gets sent to the other person and pops up on their screen instantly. in my experience the Yahoo! Messenger system seems to be the one most commonly used, and since you may have gotten an account with Yahoo!, you would have the ability to use that system already, you just need to download and install Yahoo! Messenger software.
now, you wonder why - well, to talk to people! once you're reconnected with them, you can talk to them! if you reconnect via Facebook its easy, you can talk in real time there - if not, and they have an Instant Messaging system use that. People with Apple computers have AOL's IM system built in with the iChat program - use it!
then lastly Twitter - this one is a little advanced. twitter is where people throw out random thoughts all day and all night, in 140 characters or less. for example, I just tweeted something random about how the heat was killing me. you can tweet anything, and people may reply or not... you can't be concerned about who you're talking to, you're talking to the world. now, you can also 'protect' your tweets, so only your authorized friends can see them. yeah, be that paranoid, because you're close friends didn't know something you should keep to yourself, so you tweeted it to them? either you aren't that close, or you have control issues. Twitter is not the place to discuss the intricate details of your finances or home life. but, it is the place to say, "hoping to travel to this place, anyone recommend a good hotel?". again, like with Facebook, grow up, learn how to handle life, don't rely on the site's security to protect you.... and if you're not relying on the site but your own wisdom to know what to put online - then, leave your tweets public. bear in mind that your reading the tweets of someone you have interest in for their knowledge may apply to you in some way as well.
ok, the heat really is killing me - more to come later... from here we're going to cover sharing media. Be prepared to spend money on a camera if your phone isn't good enough. We're going to share pics of your life online! PS - Chrissy, can't believe you tweeted a link to my blog... god love ya.
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